{"id":344,"date":"2006-01-03T15:50:57","date_gmt":"2006-01-03T23:50:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lianza.org\/blog\/?p=344"},"modified":"2006-01-03T15:50:57","modified_gmt":"2006-01-03T23:50:57","slug":"facts-about-chuck-norris","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lianza.org\/blog\/2006\/01\/03\/facts-about-chuck-norris\/","title":{"rendered":"Facts about Chuck Norris"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Apparently these are circulating via e-mail, but they&#8217;re also on <a href=\"http:\/\/dallas.metblogs.com\/archives\/2005\/11\/31_little_known.phtml\">several<\/a> <a href=\"http:\/\/mike.wordpress.com\/2005\/12\/05\/chuck-norris-the-facts\/\">blogs.<\/a><\/p>\n<p>A few of my favorites:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Chuck Norris\u00e2\u20ac\u2122 tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.<\/li>\n<li>If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.<\/li>\n<li>Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.<\/li>\n<li>The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.<\/li>\n<li>Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.<\/li>\n<li>Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse&#8230; horses are hung like Chuck Norris.<\/li>\n<li>Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability.  Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn&#8217;t stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming.  They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Apparently these are circulating via e-mail, but they&#8217;re also on several blogs. A few of my favorites: Chuck Norris\u00e2\u20ac\u2122 tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death. Chuck Norris does [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-344","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-amusing"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p5TCqO-5y","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lianza.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/344","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lianza.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lianza.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lianza.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lianza.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=344"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/lianza.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/344\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lianza.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=344"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lianza.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=344"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lianza.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=344"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}