This Onion article was great.

According to Oebrick, Michael is fussy during meals and picky about his clothes. When he hurts himself, he “cries like a baby.” Additionally, the toddler has a “very strong attraction” to a stuffed lion with a rainbow-striped mane, an apparent preference for bottle-feeding over breastfeeding, and an evident love for bouncing up and down in his jumper device “like some guy at a club.”